The Come Drink Beer Cafe

When one visits an establishment with an acronym for a name, and that acronym stands for "Come Drink Beer", one has certain expectations.

Unfortunately, CDB seemed to treat their beer menu like many restaurants treat their wine lists; as in, they're not too particular in maintaining a supply of what's offered.

From a menu that contained fifteen or so imported varieties, all of which I've seen elsewhere (expectation number two was that they had some mystical supply of beer I'd yet to see in India), they had a grand total of three. When the waiter sensed our frustration with this revelation, he drove the point home by walking over to the refrigerator and coming back with one bottle each of Corona, Asahi, and Peroni to show us the menu much like you'd expect at dessert. Defeated, I ordered an IMFL (Indian-made foreign liquor) Budweiser. It doesn't taste like a real Budwesier (no complaints there) and is only marginally better than the typical selections of Kingfisher and Foster's.

After the disappointment of the CDB, I've decided my next challenge is to try and find "Little Devil's India Pale Ale", which is apparently the only IPA actually brewed in India <insert obvious ironic reference to the "I" in IPA here>. I've yet to see it offered and not even sure the company that brews it still exists, but if anyone can find, I think I might be just the man.

Sunday Brunch, A Tradition Like No Other

During the high heat of the six month Delhi summer, an expatriate weekend is hardly complete without the time-honored tradition of Sunday brunch. Over the past six weeks, we have been out to brunch exactly six times. I've determined Sunday brunch is the sole reason I haven't seen Biggest Loser-like weight loss. Brunches in India typically fall into one of two categories; the "over the top social scene" brunch and the "restaurant just wants to make life easier on themselves" brunch. We've been to both, and not surprisingly, find ourselves gravitating toward the former category.

Over the past few weeks, we've been fortunate enough to brunch (is it inappropriate to use it as a verb?) at Set'z (which is apparently a trendy way to spell the word "zest"), Olive, and the Leela Kempinski Gurgaon. Each of these places is basically at the same price point, INR 1800 - 2400 ($40 - $50), which is a lot of money here for a meal, but surprisingly, I've never walked away disappointed or feeling like it wasn't worth the price. Not only is it basically our only meal of the day but it also serves as entertainment for the better part of the afternoon. From my perspective, I'm actually keeping Lindsay from shopping for 3+ hours on a Sunday, so it could be (easily) argued that these brunches actually save money.

Set'z (aka, Zest)
Like many nice things in India, Set'z is located in a mall. However, the DLF Emporio Mall is unlike any other mall I've seen in India. If you're into super-luxe shops, it puts the Magnificent Mile or other shopping meccas to shame; it's home to Delhi's outlets for extreme luxury goods; Versace, Dior, Cartier, Armani, and Jimmy Choo to name a few. For the most part, the only thing I can afford in the building is brunch at Set'z. The food is split into geographic genres that span the globe. Culinary highlights include freshly tossed Caesar salad and some of the best sushi I've had in India. In addition to the food and what helps provide the value in the INR 2000 cost, is the free flow of imported sparkling wine or whatever your beverage of choice. Of course, this portion of the brunch basically renders the rest of your day unproductive, there are certainly worse places and ways to toil away an afternoon in India.

Olive
Set in close proximity to Qutab Minar, Olive at 1 Style Mile has long been one of our favorite restaurants in Delhi. Part of the allure of Olive is it's outdoor setting under a huge banyan tree. So while they do have indoor seating and it's likely a better choice during the winter, they do a nice job of cooling down the outdoors with large fans and misting machines (yes, like the ones on sidelines at football games). The spread at Olive isn't quite as extensive as the other locations; however, there are still ample choices including their thin crust pizza and a live grill with excellent prawns. The only down side to Olive (since the price requires you to drink to achieve the desired level of value) is that sparkling wine is not included in the price. While the other choices were more than adequate, you've got to think this will become some sort of competitive disadvantage down the road.

Leela Kempinski
The Leela was the site of this week's brunch and easily had the most extensive selection. If you wanted it, you could basically have it. I hadn't been to the Leela hotel, which is one of Gurgaon's newer business hotels, and had heard very good things both about the hotel and the brunch. They even found a way to give a hotel located adjacent to one of Gurgaon's largest malls actual views of something other than construction. While our table looked out over the hotel entrance, just across the road was actual open space yet to be claimed by DLF or Unitech or whatever other development company comes along next. Described by the locals as jungle (and who am I to argue), it actually looks a little more like desert with scrub trees, it's still a nice break from the constant views of progress (i.e., cranes and construction). The only detriment to the experience was the "iced popsicle with alcohol" the waiter passed around the table. It was ice on a stick soaking in some blue liquid in a tumbler. Looked appetizing enough. What they failed to mention was that it had been "Indianized" with a dusting of masala powder. Not a flavor I enjoy, yet not near enough to destroy the experience.

While it's probably not necessary to hit these brunch spots each week, if for no other reasons than it both makes me sound like a pompous entitled brat and inspires a certain level of lethargy and naps, these Sunday afternoons do provide a great way to meet and connect with friends (and provides a nice respite from the heat, noise, chaos found in most other parts of our expatriate world).

Indian Wine Snob

There are typically three price points when ordering wine in a restaurant in India; in ascending order of price; (1) domestic, (2) “cheap” imported, and (3) ultra expensive imported. Since wine storage doesn’t seem to be skill yet mastered (we had dinner with a friend returning to the states last night, ordered a bottle of red, and had to wait for it to come down to room temperature; once it did, it was actually quite pleasant). Based on this storage issue, group (3) has a risk/reward proposition that makes it a no-win situation. This group of wines is typically fun for the sole purpose of seeing exactly how much they’re trying to charge, which routinely tops $100 – $200 for a wine you could probably buy at Binny’s in Chicago for no more than $15. The wine mark-up has totally new meaning in a place with a 100% duty on imported liquor from some countries. That clause “from some countries” seems to be a relatively new concept and has lead to the creation of group (2). For some reason, certain Italian and Chilean wines have come down in price; I would assume there’s been some sort of new trade agreement in palace. I’m not the type to proactively do that kind of research, so let’s just assume that as a fact. Thankfully, you can now get some bottles in restaurants in the $35 range. With this group, you’re overpaying for the quality of the wine, but the only other option is Indian domestic. This group is typically priced around $5 cheaper by the bottle (i.e., not low enough to typically incent a purchase).

Once you've made your selection in a restaurant, it’s always a good idea to have three or four backups ready (which likely comprises the entire wine menu). I’ve yet to order an imported wine where the waiter claimed it was in stock (keep in mind, I’m not ordering from group (3)). Automatically, your selection is out of stock, but there always seems to be French wine available. This French wine typically has the varietal splashed across label. I don’t know much about French wine, but I do know enough to know the varietal is typically assumed based on the region and not nearly as important as on an American label. Basically, these wines aren’t France’s finest. Typically, if there’s nothing else to your liking, you can politely ask them to go back and check to see if there might be one bottle of your original selection. Magically, they’ll either appear a few minutes later with your original selection or some other option that was likely not part of the original menu but priced at the same point. At this point, I feel like a sucker for just not going with the Indian domestic but too proud (or cheap) to switch over; it’s going to be no worse than what they’ve put in front of you. In the end, that extra $5 for the import might be the smarting pricing decision the restauranteur has made.

Last Call at Our First "Bash"

Last night was our first “official” function with Gurgaon Connection, which is the expat group based in our adopted hometown. It was a Valentine’s Day “Bash”, which is the name given to their quarterly parties, and was held at the new Courtyard Marriott. Our primary objective was to meet some new people.

The most surprising thing was the general lack of Americans; it turned out that even a woman we had met at tea a couple weeks ago who had moved from Fargo, ND was actually Canadian. We met one couple that had met, never sailed before, bought a boat, and spent four years sailing from port to port around the world. While on their travels, they found time to adopt two children, one from the Marshall Islands and one from Kirabati (of which I had surprisingly strong knowledge thanks to J. Maarten Troost’s Sex Lives of Cannibals, which it turns out is about as appreciated on that island nation as Slumdog Millionaire is in India). We met another woman who had been out in Delhi the night before , somehow ended up riding an elephant at 5:00am, and had the pictures to prove it. Needless to say, our “graduate from college, get real jobs, live in the suburbs” background seems a little mundane, but maybe it’s just our little addition to the diversity pot? In general, these seem like the types of people that can only enhance this experience.

The other not-so-great news that I learned last night, and may have been something new based on the reaction from people that have been here for a while, was the last call rules in Haryana, which is the state where we live.  The party was scheduled to last until midnight with last call at 11:45; however, at 11:30 the hotel staff quickly started breaking down the bar.  When asked what was going on, the bartender said, “Last call is at 11:45.”  I looked at my watch and said, “Yeah, but it’s only 11:33”.  This caused utter confusion for the next half hour as expat after expat approached the bar, tried their own way to talk their way into a drink (which may or may not have involved bribes) to no avail. Perhaps it’s because the hotel is brand new and didn’t want to risk any sort of alcohol permit infraction, but I was amazed (impressed would be the wrong word based on what was being withheld) that they stuck to closing the bar fifteen minutes early; the reason for which may go unexplained forever.

The "Looksie"

It's official: I have something in common with Plaxico Burress.  Thankfully, my ability to travel and general sense of personal liberty won't be quite as limited; however, we both should return to mainstream American society at some point in 2011.

It's probably a little anti-climactic to some of our closest friends and I'm sure many are sick of hearing about it, but Lindsay and I are moving to India in January.  In preparation for the big move, Lindsay and I spent the ten days prior to Thanksgiving on our official "looksie" trip to Gurgaon, primarily to find a place to live but also to spend time in the office getting to know our new co-workers.

Lindsay had been back twice this year; however, this was my first trip to India since our six-month assignment from October 2004 - April 2005.  While some things have absolutely changed (Gurgaon has quite figuratively exploded), some things remain much the same ("Friends" is still a staple on Star World TV's "happy hour" in the evening).  The biggest difference between this assignment and the last (other than the duration) is the fact that we'll be living as "true" expats this time around; that is, in the comfort of a fully-serviced apartment close to the office rather than in the comfort of the Taj Palace Hotel in Delhi.

As with any trip to India you learn to expect the unexpected and learn to be more patient; however,in the end, the place finds a way to endear itself to you.   That being said, here are the quick hit highlights and observations from our trip....

Ahhhhh, Safety
"Security" is a way of life in India.  I'd estimate that on the average day, a person probably goes through some semblance (or appearance) of a security checkpoint five of six times.

Our hotel, the Crowne Plaza, employed two layer security to gain access to the lobby; however, the layers seem to vary based on the audience.  When driving onto the hotel grounds, we were surprised at the level of care that was taken to ensure the car wasn't wired.  In fact, the car was checked in no fewer than four places: under the car, under the hood, in the trunk, and in the glove box.  All of this in intended to make one feel safe; however, I'm not convinced the guards are trained on what exactly to keep an eye on; however, the rifle carried by one is imposing enough.  In addition, we learned later in the week, with thanks to a former co-worker, Jaideep Agrawal, that when he drove in alone to pick us up that the check was nowhere near as thorough and he was allowed to pass through without the guards looking in the car.

Once you graduate the first check, you then must pass a bag screen and walk through a metal detector to gain entry to the actual hotel.  However, you're not forced to empty your pockets so every person sets off the alarm.  From that point, women are allowed to enter freely and men must survive a check from one of those security wands.  Again, cell phones and whatever else are still in pockets, so the wand alarm would go off each time I walked in the hotel; however, I was never asked to empty my pockets and was allowed free entry to the hotel.

On the bright side, at least they make you walk through the metal detector.  I can remember five years ago walking into the Maurya Sheraton in Delhi, seeing metal detectors, and testing the guards by walking around the detector with absolutely no consequence.  This doesn't seem like that big of a deal....except that Hugo Chavez was staying in the hotel at the time.

Other than hotel safety, you'll be relieved to know the future apartment has a similar setup, so don't worry about us.  As a quick tip when you come visit, just look Western and act like you know what you're doing and you should be fine.

Bar Tricks
While physical safety is of primary concern, it was reassuring to see that workplace safety ranks high as well.  We ventured to Ambience Mall for one of Gurgaon's two microbrews for lunch one day (the beer was better than expected, even better (surprisingly) than Kingfisher, the king of good times).  There was a promotional banner hanging high above the bar that needed to come down.  I wasn't sure how they had originally hung the thing; however, we quickly learned how it was coming down when four men emerged with a 12 - 15 foot step ladder though there was nothing to lean the thing against.  Three of the guys stood in the middle of the bar holding the thing vertical and, sure enough, the fourth slowly started climbing the rungs....while the other three supported the base.

He ascended to the top rung (something I wouldn't even do with a stable base) and began yanking on the banner.  When yanking failed to extract the banner, he was forced to descend and took some sort of tool back up with him to help.  Eventually he was successful and the banner came down.  The most surprising part of this sequence was that Lindsay and I seemed to be the only two people transfixed and the only two people that found this somewhat less than safe.

The Crowne Plaza
The Crowne Plaza Gurgaon is a very nice hotel; however, it's very much a business hotel.  In fact, it's quite possible that the only room in the hotel with more than one resident was our's.  Every morning we'd go to the buffet breakfast at G Cafe, which was included with the room, and they'd ask me for my room number.  After I'd reply "4021", they'd ask Lindsay the same question.  She'd reply, "the same", and the hostess (the same each day) always seemed a little skeptical.  At any rate, it took a while for the staff to buy our story and a good six or seven days for them to stop offering us separate checks.

Apparently, poker and gambling has experienced the same growth explosion in India as in the United States.  While waiting for a friend for lunch one day in the lobby, Lindsay and I quite innocently pulled out a deck of cards to pass the time playing gin rummy.  We played one hand and then noticed a member of the staff looking nervously at us.  Lindsay then saw a hostess give that member a nod or a look and he immediately approached us and said, "sir, no cards in open spaces, it's gambling".  Reluctantly, even though there was no money or chips to be seen, we decided it best to sit quietly.  Quite the different cultural experience from a place like Ireland where gambling in the open isn't just accepted, it's basically encouraged.

Ohio State / Michigan
I posted this on Facebook, but approximately two hours before kickoff, we were headed to Delhi for dinner at Olive, one of our favorite restaurants.  At the tollbooth to Delhi on Mehrauli Road, I was suprised to see a guy wearing an Ohio State sweatshirt.  I can say with 99% certainty that he had no idea he was wearing the sweatshirt for a team about to engage in its fiercest and most traditional rivalry.  I can say with 100% certainty that he had no idea that a certain coach from West Virginia has basically killed one side of that rivalry and turned the ferocity of that rivalry down a notch or two.

Northern Spice
My new team at work went out for a team lunch at a traditional northern Indian kebab restuarant.  As usual, the food was phenomenal and plentiful; however, we nearly didn't eat as our table of nine didn't seem to be the waiter's priority.  After ordering (a complex order consisting of "8 non-veg and 1 veg lunch served family style at the table) we thought we were in the clear.  As the minutes passed we began to grow a little impatient.  The waiter came back fifteen or so minutes later and, with a move straight out of "Groundhog's Day", asked if he could take our order.  Awesome.  Everyone at the table immediately asked the waiter to send over his manager.  Not surprisingly, his manager wasn't set to arrive for another two or three hours.

If you've been to India, you've undoubtedly taken part in the ritual of filling out a survey card for service at a hotel or restaurant.  This may have been the first time I haven't seen it offered though that didn't keep one of the more assertive of the bunch to ask for a survey card.  Somewhat surprisingly, they weren't out of cards and she was actually given one.  In our first bit of teambuilding, we jointly redefined the scale and filled out the card.  As we got up from the table, one team member gave the card to the waiter and we could see him reading it as we left the restuarant.  Suffice to say, that card didn't find its way into the waiter's employment record.

The Bucket List
If this trip did nothing else, it made this whole "we're moving to India" thing very, very real.  While we're both extremely excited for the adventure we have in front of us, but the fact that we're moving half way around the world in under 40 days is just a bit more apparent today than it was only a couple of weeks ago.  There are still of lot of logistics to care for; doctor's appointments, tax briefings, and determining which personal items stay and which go to name a few.  In addition, it's tough to find the right balance between spending time with family and friends and striking the right balance between talking about the experience and going about our day to day lives.  That being said, if you come across me between now and January 7th, you absolutely have the right to say, "stop talking about India, you idiot, I know you're going, I know you're excited about it, but let's get to the important stuff --- how do you like the Hawks' chances in the _____ Bowl?" (Note, while I absolutely want the Hawks in the Fiesta, there's something cathartic about the possibility of watching them take down yet another SEC team for 3 hours on New Year's Day....even though Boise State would be a tougher test than the #3 team in the SEC).